Why Everything Feels So Dull and How You Can Fix It

Has your life ever felt boring, dull, or simply less exciting than it used to be when you were younger? If so, you are not alone. As we move from childhood to adolescence to adulthood, life can feel more and more like a series of tasks to be completed rather than an exciting journey. The daily grind of work, household chores, taking care of children or pets, or running errands often becomes habitual, developing a daily or weekly cadence over time.

Habits and Hedonic Adaptation

Habits are a critical element of high-functioning performance. James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits, reveals that small habits, repeated consistently, compound into tremendous results. He opens with the British cycling team, which had won just one Olympic gold medal in nearly a century. In Clear’s telling, that changed when coach Dave Brailsford began chasing tiny “marginal gains”: bringing riders’ own pillows to hotels, having a surgeon teach proper handwashing to avoid illness, and dozens of other small improvements. Within a decade, British riders dominated Olympic cycling, and in 2012 Bradley Wiggins became the first British rider to win the Tour de France. In sum, habits are practically useful. But when performed over and over, they can begin to make life feel predictable, boring, and dull. Clear himself notes that the greatest threat to sticking with a habit isn’t failure but boredom.

This is where hedonic adaptation comes in. Hedonic adaptation is the tendency to emotionally adapt to the same experience over time. In a classic 1978 study, lottery winners were no happier than non-winners months after their win, and they took less pleasure in everyday activities¹. Think back to the first time you flew on an airplane. It was probably exciting and emotionally charged. As you continue flying over time, it becomes less exciting each trip. In terms of our everyday lives, hedonic adaptation occurs whenever we repeat the same actions, blunting our emotional response over time. Habits are a double-edged sword, allowing us to complete tasks effortlessly via routines while also falling prey to hedonic adaptation over time, leading to emotional tedium.

We Crave Novelty and Hate Boredom

Our brains enjoy new positive experiences, which add spice to life. This is the reason traveling to a new location or trying a new restaurant is so pleasant. But just how important is excitement and novelty? In a 2014 study, psychologists asked people to do something basic: Sit alone in a room for up to 15 minutes with absolutely nothing to do but think (no cell phones allowed)². Most participants didn’t enjoy it much, and in a comparison study, people who spent the same amount of time reading or listening to music enjoyed themselves far more. In another study, participants first received a mild electric shock, and many said they would pay money to avoid feeling it again. The researchers then left them alone with their thoughts, along with a button that delivered that same shock. Shockingly (no pun intended), two-thirds of the men (12 of 18) and a quarter of the women (6 of 24) shocked themselves at least once as a distraction from sitting alone with their thoughts.

In other research, neuroscientists examined whether diversity in experiences and physical locations was linked to positive mood³. They tracked participants’ phone GPS for three to four months and measured how varied their daily locations were, controlling for factors like weather, distance traveled, and day of the week. Days with more variety were linked with more positive emotion. As lead author Aaron Heller put it, for each person, more exploration meant feeling happier. Heller also noted that brand-new places appeared to matter even more than familiar ones. Worth noting was the bidirectional nature of the effect; more diverse experiences predicted better mood, and better mood predicted more exploration afterward.

Why Money Can Buy Novelty

Money can’t buy happiness outright, but it can buy novelty, and how you spend it matters. Research finds that experiential purchases like trips, concerts, and meals out bring more lasting happiness than material purchases, partly because experiences become part of who we are and the stories we tell⁴. Experiences also pay off before they happen: Waiting for an experience feels more pleasant and exciting than waiting for a possession⁵, so booking something weeks ahead buys you weeks of anticipation. And because we adapt quickly to big purchases, many small, varied pleasures tend to deliver more happiness than one large splurge⁶. In short, the best way to spend money to combat dullness is to buy variety.

What You Can Do to Fight Dullness

To spice things up and fight back against dullness, here are some novelty tips which include free and paid options. Free options include:

• Take a different route to work or run errands. Rather than take the more “efficient” route you take on a weekly basis, explore a new path.
• Work somewhere new. If you are a remote worker, try a new library or coffee shop for the day instead of working at home.
• Grocery shop somewhere new. Try an international market and buy one ingredient you’ve never cooked with.
• Talk to a stranger. Socializing is engaging and novel because conversations are inherently dynamic and unpredictable, especially with a new person. People consistently underestimate how much they’ll enjoy talking with strangers⁷.
• Learn a new skill. Learning something new about an unfamiliar topic creates engagement and a sense of progress.
• Explore an existing skill. Even if you spend time on a skill you’ve developed, learn a new subdomain of the topic. For example, if you are a piano player, try playing a new song that’s not your typical style.
• Put your phone away for 15 minutes. Focus on what’s happening around you, or try a short meditation practice.

Paid but cheap options include:

• Try a new coffee shop or beer garden you’ve never visited before.
• Sign up for a beginner’s class for an activity that interests you. This should not feel like a “chore”, but rather something stimulating and new.
• Buy a ticket to a local sporting event, concert, or fine arts performance.
• Plan a day trip to somewhere nearby. Even going an hour outside your town for the day counts as novelty.
• Try a new restaurant with someone. Bonus points if it’s a cuisine you don’t normally eat.
• Do something childish! Play a retro video game, go jump at a trampoline park, or play laser tag.
• Round up friends for a karaoke night.

Pricey but impactful options include:

• Plan a vacation. Go somewhere you haven’t been before, or plan a smaller trip with someone you don’t see enough or have not traveled with before. Book it weeks ahead so you can enjoy the anticipation.
• Join a new club or group. Sign up for a new gym or activity group you’ve been considering but putting off. Don’t wait.
• Buy something that creates new experiences. Think a kayak, a telescope, or a motorcycle you’ll take on new routes, rather than a nicer version of something you already own.
• Go see a big-ticket live event you’ve never experienced. This could be your favorite sports team, musical artist, or TED talk.
• Move. Physically relocating is a surefire way to inject novelty into everyday life and get a fresh start.

The Bottom Line

Habits will always be part of a well-functioning life, and that’s a good thing. The goal isn’t to abandon your routines but to build novelty around them. Keep the habits that serve you, and deliberately add new places, people, and experiences to the edges of your week. Even one new thing a week can be enough to break the pattern.

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