SINGAPORE: Picking out the perfect engagement ring can be a stressful, time-consuming process for many men—from choosing between gold and silver, to deciding on a lab-grown or natural diamond, to getting the cut, size, and style just right to match their partner's taste.
However, one Singaporean woman has gone against the grain, revealing online that she turned down the idea of an engagement ring altogether and asked her partner for a matching couple watch instead.
Her comment came after a local man took to r/sgdatingscene to ask: “Diamond Rings For Marriage Proposals: Yay or Nay? Just curious to know the general sentiment of Singaporean Redditors towards diamond rings, and their usage in marriage proposals.”
He added, “Will you use a diamond ring to propose marriage to your partner? Do you believe in diamond rings being used as the physical symbol presented to propose marriage? Will you date somebody who does not believe in proposing marriage with a diamond ring? What other alternative options do you accept in lieu of a diamond ring to use in a marriage proposal?”
Commenters quickly weighed in with their thoughts, and the woman's response stood out.
She said, “I blatantly asked for a watch instead (and gifted a watch back). We are both still wearing the same watches and have no wedding band/engagement ring.”
Her practical, mutual approach resonated with many others who feel rings don't suit their lifestyle.
Another woman replied that she had made the same choice because she doesn't wear jewellery at all.
“I explicitly asked for a watch back then because I don’t wear jewellery. In fact, it can be diamond earrings, bracelets, or whatever you want, not necessarily rings or diamond rings. Ultimately, it's symbolism, and the intention matters more. I would say it is best to communicate with your partner on preferences.”
A third commenter, a full-time piano teacher, agreed: “Wah, not even into jewellery. I am a full-time piano teacher, so I prefer my hands free. I might ask for a necklace instead.”
A married man also weighed in, sharing that he had bought his wife a gold ruby ring instead of a diamond one because she loves rubies.
“It is all about the partner being happy. If your current one likes diamonds, you should give it to her,” the man wrote.
“Making the girl happy is the most important [thing]. Happy wife, happy life. Life hack from uncle. Proposal rings are too small things to bicker over. Life as a married couple has a lot of challenges. Unemployment, health crises, in-laws, how to raise children, etc.”
Another user added, “I actually told my partner that I don’t mind if it’s NOT a diamond. We’ve been looking at moissanite rings too. I don’t believe in diamond rings as a symbol. Growing up reading fantasies, I actually thought necklaces and bracelets were the norm as betrothal gifts.”
Engagement tokens
The diamond engagement ring tradition dates back to 1477, when Archduke Maximilian of Austria presented the first recorded diamond engagement ring to Mary of Burgundy. This royal gesture set a trend among European nobility, and eventually spread to other cultures.
While the custom endures, choices today are far more diverse. Relationship experts note that couples can mark an engagement with other tokens such as a necklace, earrings, bracelet, or watch.
Diamonds have long been favoured for their durability, which came to symbolise the idea that marriage lasts forever.
Watches, meanwhile, can carry their own symbolism. As everyday accessories, they can serve as reminders of a couple's shared time, the memories they have made and the years they look forward to spending together.
Ultimately, the choice of an engagement gift comes down to the couple.