Taking yourself on a date sounds straightforward until your “solo date” becomes buying toothpaste, answering emails at a café, or squeezing in your usual workout. Useful? Sure. Romantic and self-nurturing? Eh, not quite. I think we can aim higher. You wouldn’t be thrilled if a romantic interest invited you out just to accompany them on errands, so you deserve to give yourself the same consideration.
Research shows that choosing to spend time alone can support relaxation and reduce stress. “It’s so easy to spend all of our time tuning out from ourselves,” says Emma Johnson, LMSW. “A solo date can help us check in with ourselves. To enjoy being in our bodies and the present.”
And yes, solo means solo. Your best friend, your partner, and even your dog need to sit this one out. Being around people at a class or concert is fine, but actually bringing a companion defeats the purpose. Make a plan. Put your phone away. Choose something because it delights you, intrigues you, or gives you a chance to discover what you like when nobody else gets a vote. Give yourself the attention you’d want from a great date.
Whether you’re single or partnered, learning to enjoy your own company deserves time on your calendar. Here are 20 ways to make that time yours.
1. Take a Pottery Class
Take a page out of Dua Lipa’s book and get your hands into some clay. Book a beginner pottery session and give yourself permission to make something slightly lopsided. You’re here to enjoy the process, not launch a ceramics business. A mug you made yourself is a cute souvenir of the afternoon—even if it holds approximately three sips of coffee.
2. Try Figure Drawing
Spend an evening appreciating the human form without wondering whether it’s going to text you back. A figure drawing session gives you something to focus on beyond your notifications, and you don’t have to be good at drawing to enjoy it.
3. Wander Through a Museum
You know that thing where you’re reading the wall text and your companion is already three galleries ahead? Not today. Pick an exhibition you actually want to see, linger over whatever catches your attention, and skip whatever doesn’t. You can spend 20 minutes with one painting or devote an afternoon to ancient jewelry. Your ticket, your itinerary.
4. Order a Wine or Beer Flight
Make a reservation for one at a tasting room or settle into a bar that offers flights, then try something beyond your usual order. Ask about the differences and notice what you actually enjoy, even if your tasting notes are mostly “yes,” “no,” and “tastes like there’s still dirt in this.” An alcohol-free tasting works, too. The date is about exploring your palate, not how much you can drink.
5. Go Antiquing
Set aside an afternoon to browse antique shops or a vintage market with no shopping list and no urgent need for a nightstand. Follow your curiosity toward strange paintings, old postcards, or the glassware you’d use at your imaginary country house. Buying something is optional. The fun is discovering what you’re drawn to when you don’t have to defend it to anyone else.
6. Pack Yourself a Picnic
Give your lunch an actual occasion. Bring a blanket, something you’re excited to eat, and a book if you’d like one, then find a comfortable spot in the park. A sandwich eaten between meetings doesn’t quite qualify; a leisurely lunch you planned just for yourself absolutely does. Stay long enough to taste your food, watch the clouds, and remember that being outside doesn’t have to involve a step count.
7. Take Yourself to a Concert
Buy a ticket to an artist you love without waiting for a friend to share your enthusiasm—or your budget. You’re going to be scream-singing the entire time anyway, so consider this a kindness to someone else’s ears. Once the music starts, you have somewhere to put all that excitement. You can also stay for the encore without negotiating with someone who wants to beat traffic.
8. Try a New Restaurant
That restaurant you keep saving on Instagram? Book it. Request a table for one or grab a seat at the bar, order what sounds good, and resist spending the entire meal pretending to be busy on your phone. My friend sets aside time for what she calls, “Meg’s Mondays.” Where she takes herself out every Monday by checking a new place off of her never ending “Wants To Go” Goggle Maps list. An important tip: don’t forget to make room for dessert. Chocolate cake tastes even better when you don’t have to share it.
9. Get Out on the Water
Rent a kayak, surfboard, paddleboard, or a really good floatie and do a water sign’s equivalent to touching grass or forest-bathing. Go solo but do it safely. Choose calm water and an established rental outfitter, wear a properly fitted life jacket when necessary, and check conditions before heading out. Let someone know you're going out and return time. If you’re new to water activities, book an introductory session rather than figuring it out offshore.
10. See a Show or Movie
Instead of streaming the latest blockbuster from your sofa, or rewatching Off Campus for the fifth time, buy a ticket to the film, play, musical, or comedy show IRL. Going alone just means no compromises over the genre, the showtime, or whether subtitles are “too much work.” Get your preferred snack and enjoy having nothing to do but watch. Afterward, give yourself a minute to decide what you thought before consulting everyone else’s reviews.
11. Take a Walk Just Because
Walking to the pharmacy is an errand. Choosing a neighborhood you’ve wanted to explore and giving yourself an hour to wander is a date. Pick a scenic route, leave the fitness tracker out of it, and notice the things you usually rush past: an elaborate front door, a tiny garden, a bakery with a very convincing window display. You’re allowed to stop. In fact, that’s sort of the point.
12. Cook Yourself a Proper Dinner
If cooking usually means assembling whatever will expire first, change the game. Choose a dish you’re excited about, put on music, and set the table like someone you’re into is coming over. That someone is: you. Light the candle, use the nice plate, and sit down to eat without a laptop beside your fork. This can be a three-course production or excellent buttered noodles. The care is what makes it a date.
13. Try Pole Dancing or Aerial Silks
Sign up for a beginner class because you’re curious about the movement, the music, or what it might feel like to channel your sexy side. Treat it as a chance to play, rather than another fitness obligation. You don’t have to perform for anyone or emerge capable of hanging upside down. Follow your instructor’s lead, laugh when something feels awkward, and notice which moments make you feel most like yourself.
14. Take Yourself to an Arcade
Who says you need a player two? Find an arcade with games you can play solo and spend an afternoon indulging your fun side. Try to beat your own score at skee-ball, shoot some hoops, or finally master that racing game without anyone asking when it’s their turn. If you win tickets, pick yourself a prize. You’ll appreciate it more knowing you earned it yourself.
15. Book a Rage Room
Yes, smashing things is an unusual date idea. But going solo also means you can bring whatever you’re angry about without having to explain it—or worry about alarming the person you’re trying to flirt with. Book a private session, suit up in the required protective gear, and follow the venue’s rules as you take a swing at the designated breakables. No pressure to look cute or keep your composure. This date can handle a little rage.
16. Take a Cooking Class
Book a class devoted to something you’ve always wanted to make: pizza, fresh pasta, dumplings, the pastry you usually buy three of. You get an activity, something delicious, and an instructor to help when your dough develops an attitude. Check the format before booking so you know whether you’ll have your own station or work in a group. Yes, Chef—arriving alone still counts, even if you chat with the person beside you.
17. Go to a Silent Disco
Everyone’s wearing headphones, and different channels mean your neighbors might be dancing to entirely different songs. Excellent conditions for following your own taste. Pick the station you like, switch whenever you feel like it, and dance without worrying whether your friends are enjoying the DJ. You don’t need a designated dance partner to have a good night.
18. Plan a Staycation or Overnight Escape
If it fits your budget, book one night somewhere you’d enjoy waking up. That might mean a hotel across town or a nearby destination you’ve been meaning to visit. Choose one outing to look forward to, then leave space for a leisurely dinner, a long bath, or reading in bed. Or take this date one step further and book a trip with a little more miles.
19. Have a Bookstore Date
Give yourself an unhurried hour in a bookstore and browse beyond the section you usually head toward. Read the opening pages of a novel, flip through a photography book, or investigate an interest you haven’t made time for yet. You don’t have to choose anything impressive—or buy anything at all. If a book catches your attention, take it to a nearby café and extend the date over a pastry.
20. Treat Yourself to a Spa Day
Book a massage, facial, or day pass to a spa and clear your schedule so you can enjoy it. Arrive with time to settle in, linger in the relaxation lounge, and put your phone on DND. You get to spend a few hours being cared for without being responsible for anything or anyone else. Honestly, a pretty dreamy date.