When I found out I was pregnant with Matteo at age 18, I remember feeling like my opportunity for a future had completely collapsed.
I didn't know how I would ever be able to go to college while raising a child, and I remember being really upset thinking about how I would never get to have a college experience.
I had just graduated high school back home in New Jersey and had always planned on going to college.
When Matteo was born, my main focus was being a mom but after he turned one I decided to go to college. I started out part-time at my local community college, and I loved going to school.
Eventually, I became a full-time student, graduated with my associate degree, and transferred to a large university in New Jersey. However, between commuting, working, paying bills, and raising a young child, I just couldn't keep up with everything.
Juggling all of the responsibilities of being a single parent while also trying to earn a degree is very hard without support from your college. I eventually stopped attending school so I could focus on working and supporting Matteo.
That was how things remained until I discovered a TikTok video about Wilson College's Single Parent Scholar (SPS) program, which helps single parents earn bachelor's degrees by providing free on-campus housing, childcare assistance and a supportive residential community.
I remember being absolutely amazed that there was a college where I could actually live on campus with my son. Better yet, I could bring our cat too! At that point, it felt too good to be true.
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Before I knew it, I was packing our things and saying goodbye to our family back home in New Jersey and heading to Pennsylvania.
I genuinely cannot say enough good things about Wilson College and its SPS program. The entire living situation is designed with parents and their children in mind. We're housed with other single parents; our kids have their own playroom right in our dorm, and the school even hosts little events specifically for our children, like easter egg hunts. Even the on-campus cafe has kid-friendly options, like smiley fries.
My professors at Wilson are also incredibly understanding. They're aware that we're single parents and the responsibilities that come along with that. I've had days where I've had absolutely no other option but to bring Matteo to class with me, and my professors have always been accommodating to that.
One of the best parts of the program is the space we have for community. We're surrounded by other moms and children who are going through the exact same things as we are. We are able to help each other with childcare, cooking, sick days, and sometimes we watch each other's kids just so someone can have a child-free break.
Matteo is now 6 and while the college has been amazing, managing my time is still a big challenge. I feel like I'm constantly choosing between cooking, doing schoolwork, shopping, cleaning, taking care of myself, and actually spending quality time with Matteo.
Living with other moms really makes things so much easier though. We're all in the same boat, so we understand when someone needs a little extra help. You always hear "it takes a village," and here we have really found ours.
I’m in my senior year and share my dorm room with my son. We’ve made ourselves a pretty comfortable little home. We've filled the space with our favorite things, and I've made sure Matteo has had the freedom to decorate his room however he wants. We've always wanted a space to call our own, so it was really important to me to make it comfortable. We even have a dorm-sized couch where we love watching scary movies together!
It definitely didn't all come together overnight, but little by little, we've made the space our own. Matteo doesn't see the dorm as any different from an apartment. It's our home, and that's exactly how I wanted it to feel.
Our mornings usually start with Matteo and me waking up and getting ready for school together. We have breakfast with my best friend and her son, which is such a nice way to start our day. Then I send Matteo off on the school bus, and I head to my classes, work, or internship. At the end of his school day, he arrives back home on the bus.
Dinner looks a little different depending on the day. Sometimes we eat at the dining hall or grab something from the café, but my favorite nights are when we eat at home. We call it "family dinner," which is when my family and my two roommates' families all sit down and eat together. Usually, one of us moms cooks for everyone, and we all pitch in to clean up afterward. It's become such a normal part of our lives that I sometimes forget how special our little arrangement really is.
After dinner, the dorm basically becomes the kids' playground. They're constantly running from room to room, playing in the playroom, and finding new ways to entertain themselves. I love that Matteo gets to come home from school every day and have his best friends right down the hall. He doesn't have to ask for a playdate or wait until the weekend to see them.
By the end of the night, all the kids usually go to bed around the same time, and most nights, the moms aren't too far behind! Our days can definitely be chaotic, but there's something really special about raising our kids alongside one another. It's not what I ever imagined our college experience would look like, but I love that this is what our everyday life has become.
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I really hope other moms see our story and realize that having a child doesn't mean they have to give up on their goals. I genuinely thought my opportunity to go to college was gone when I became pregnant, and now I'm about to graduate with my bachelor's degree and pursue a graduate program.
I also really want colleges and universities to see our story.
I'm actually doing research on parents in higher education, and one thing I've learned is that student parents make up a much larger portion of the undergraduate population than most people probably realize. [The U.S. Government Accountability Office said that about 1 in 5 U.S. undergraduates—roughly 4.3 million students—were parents in 2015-16.] Yet, their needs are so often overlooked. I want other institutions to see that programs like Wilson's are possible and that they make an enormous difference.
I also want other moms to know that we can advocate for ourselves. We shouldn't have to feel like we're asking for too much by wanting an education and the support to make it possible. We deserve to be there just as much as anyone else. I think if more institutions started listening to student parents and understanding what we actually need, we'd see a lot more success stories.
I went from thinking I would never get to experience college to living on a college campus with my son. I'm now an honors student with a 3.9 GPA, starting the process of applying to graduate schools, and most of all, I got to do all of this with my son by my side.
I hope to pursue a Ph.D. in psychology and continue advocating for student parents in higher education. I've really fallen in love with research, and I'd love to continue using it to bring attention to issues that are often overlooked.
More than anything, I just want us to have a happy life together and keep experiencing new things. I hope that when Matteo gets older, he looks back on all of this and realizes that having him never stopped me from pursuing my dreams. If anything, he's been along for the entire adventure.
Newsweek’s reporters and editors used Martyn, our AI assistant, to produce this story. Learn more about Martyn here.
Contact Newsweek editors on this story: Marc Vargas and James Debens