SINGAPORE: A Singaporean fresh graduate has complained about being caught in a frustrating workplace cycle, alleging that her boss encouraged her to ask questions but ignored her when she did, only to later criticise her work and blame her for poor performance.
In a post on r/askSingapore, the employee said her first full-time role has been “killing her on the inside.”
She claimed that whenever she submitted tasks, her boss would reject them as not “what he wanted” or not in line with company standards, without clarifying the requirements from the start.
She also said she routinely submitted work before the deadline to allow time for revisions. However, instead of receiving feedback, she alleged her boss revised the work himself, at times using ChatGPT, and forwarded it to senior management without informing her.
She added that urgent tasks were often flagged as unsatisfactory only near the deadline, leaving her with no opportunity to improve. In other instances, she said her messages seeking vetting or clarification were left unread for hours. By the time she received a reply, she had already completed the task, which was still marked as wrong.
Moreover, according to the post, her boss had repeatedly urged her to ask questions, be proactive, and learn quickly, yet when she did ask, she was allegedly ignored. When she sought help from colleagues or referred to past work examples, she was told to “check with her colleagues again,” creating what she called a repeated cycle with no clear direction.
Things eventually escalated to the point where HR called her in for a review, which caught her off guard as she had not expected her boss to be present at the meeting as well.
“Genuinely, I thought this was going to be just me and the HR. I didn't get to say much [that time], and it was just one-sided of them telling me I suck. I tried defending myself a bit but realised it was quite futile and was told that I might have to be let go if I don't pull my socks.”
In a subsequent one-on-one conversation, she said her boss told her that the workplace “is not a school” and that with three staff members to manage, he simply has no time to “teach her everything.”
The employee said she understood her boss may be busy, which was why she often approached colleagues. Still, she felt frustrated at being told to ask questions while also being treated as a burden for asking.
“It feels very contradictory, and either way, I'm on the shorter end of the stick.”
“I'm told I'm not 'thinking' enough, but when I 'think,' I'm told I 'think too much.” I’m told I’m not proactive enough. I'm already searching for another job, because the whole HR talk was just very blatant; they want me to resign on my own.”
‘Find another company culture that fits you better’
Sympathising with the fresh grad, one Singaporean Redditor offered her some words of encouragement: “Please don’t let these early experiences make you doubt your abilities or lose your confidence.
“You’re a fresh graduate. You’re supposed to ask questions, make mistakes, learn how things work, and gradually develop your own judgement. That’s part of growing into a professional. Nobody should expect you to understand someone’s expectations without clearly communicating them.”
Another commenter said they had faced the same struggles in their first job with unsupportive managers, and advised her to stay on a little longer for the learning experience if she is passionate about the work.
“If you are passionate about your area of work, evaluate whether you can tahan and stay a little bit longer just for the learning experiences. Otherwise, I suggest you look out and find another company culture that fits you better. MNC perhaps?”
A third reassured her that she is not alone, as even mid-career workers face similar issues.
“Don’t worry, you are not alone on this. Even mid-careerists or folks who have a few years of experience under their belts may face the same issue. One thing you can consider is asking your boss exactly what they want and their expectations, and then documenting them down. It has to be measurable and achievable and not some vague goals like “be more proactive” (ya, but how and in what sense?). This way, both of you would be on the same page and have guidelines on work.”/TISG
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