An Igbo bride price to copy – By Richard Maduku

By Richard Maduku

When my son told me about the next stage for his fiancee who is from Enugu state, I was taken aback by my first concern. Unlike some relatives and friends, it was not the high bride price that Igbo parents are often accused of demanding especially if their daughter was a university graduate.

“I hope the Ninth Mile Corner is no longer a death trap to motorists entering Enugu?” I wondered to myself immediately after my son broke the news that he will soon travel to Enugu to pay the bride price of his fiancee. This was after the introduction ceremony in Lagos where the father lives.

Since I have not heard about the Ninth Mile Corner for over four decades now, I was surprised that it was the first thing that came to my mind on hearing the name Enugu.

The Ninth Mile Corner used to be a dangerous incline for motorists just before entering Enugu town by road. But it was not my only concern.

I was also concerned about the names my son was likely to give to his children. Since he could not speak Urhobo, my language, I was afraid he might give words such as Happiness, Wisdom, Success, Goodness etc etc to his children as names as many young parents are doing nowadays.

I loathe such names, especially the belief behind most of them. It is believed that the child named Success will be successful in life. That no sorrow will befall the one named Happiness and the one named Wisdom will become a Solomon etc etc. The belief became more popular with the rise of Dr Goodluck Jonathan who became a state governor and a president without contesting for both high offices all because Goodluck is his name!

I resolved to talk to my son one day why such names should be avoided and from that moment I began to search my brain for Urhobo names that are not difficult to pronounce.  I intend presenting three to five such names to him to choose from when they eventually have a baby.

While mentally searching for the Urhobo names, the list of items that the prospective father-in-law demanded for the bride price ceremony was sent to my son.

My eyes ran through it quickly and was somehow relieved that though it was much, it had no item that cost a small fortune. A cow was not on it, so too were no goats, not even one goat. Beer was probably the most expensive item on it.

Two groups were on the list: the family of the father of the bride was the first. The other was the larger family known as the umunah.

Altogether, six cartoons of beer whose brand were stated (all brewed in the East) were what was demanded. Two cartoons out of the six are to be small stout.

The other drinks are two cartons of a particular malt drink and four gallons of palm wine. As for edibles, one big food flask (commonly referred to as cooler) was to be provided.

Twenty thousand naira cash was also to be made available for kola nuts, snuff and garden eggs. No amount was however stated as the bride price.

My son was not frightened by the list but was afraid the bride price proper might be something beyond him. So as not to be humiliated on the day of the ceremony by this most important item, I phoned the father of the girl to tell us the amount my son is expected to pay as the bride price.

He replied that it is the family that will decide the bride price but that he will do everything to ensure it was not too high.

My son grumbled that he doesn’t want to spend money on chartering a bus, sewing dresses, printing cards and sundry things too many to list all only to be denied the wife because of the bride price he couldn’t afford to pay on the last day.

I saw his fears as genuine but I encouraged him not to chicken out before D-day; that I don’t think it will be above what he can afford.

As I was not attending, my son and his guests departed early in the morning on the day the marriage was to take place in an 18-seater minibus and a station wagon that could carry seven passengers. A few of his mother’s relatives and friends will be joining them from other places.

The lines were bad but I learnt that they were not entering Enugu town itself. My concern about Ninth Mile Corner was no longer relevant. I also learnt that they arrived at their destination safely before the networks began to worsen so much that I gave up phoning.

They returned before noon the next day without my son and his wife.

“How was everything?” I fired at my nephew who represented me before he even sat down.

“Everything went well.” He replied before he sat down to tell me the details.

When I asked how much my son was made to cough out as bride price, I heard a story resembling something out of wonderland.

When it got to the stage the bride price was to be paid, an empty bowl was placed before my son and his group. They were then asked to drop the cash they had into the bowl one by one.

The spokesman of the host family asked them to repeat when what they dropped the first time did not meet his expectation. They did as instructed.

I know that nobody carries much cash when travelling these days. Without being told, I knew that very little cash will be there in the bowl.

The father of the girl then stepped out and picked a one thousand naira note from the bowl before handing it with the rest of the money to my son. My son was told to use the money to cover some of their expenses on getting home with his wife. It did not end there.

The one thousand naira note the father-in-law picked from the bowl, a bottle of an alcoholic drink and one kola nut were given to my representative to bring to me with the instructions that I should not replace the one thousand naira note with another.

That my son and his wife are to bring the same naira note back to the father-in-law in this same town when they have their first baby. It was emphasised that I should not replace the one thousand naira note with another.

I wondered to myself if they wrote the number on that naira note down or gave it a mark for them to recognise it in the future.

Later the next day, my son called to inform me that he stayed behind to do a few things that he could not delegate to any other person. He called from a different town.

I am yet to find out if this emulatable bride price is unique to only the town or only the family of my daughter-in-law.

I deliberately left the name of the town and even the local government out here to prevent hordes of young men going bride-hunting there every weekend to spoil the market for my other sons!

Richard Maduku, a retired Nigerian Army (Infantry) Captain and novelist, lives in Effurun-Otor, Delta State.