- Unathi Nkayi shared emotional photos from her son's initiation season, revealing the personal challenges she faced as a divorcee
- The media personality opened up about going an entire year without speaking to her son's father, even via text, before the initiation
- Unathi announced she will be a guest speaker at initiation season events and invited bookings from moms seeking guidance
Source: Instagram
Unathi Nkayi has pulled back the curtain on one of the most emotionally raw chapters of her life. On 1 October 2026, the South African media personality took to Instagram to share a heartfelt reflection on her son's initiation journey, alongside throwback photos she says surfaced in her phone's memories nearly three years later.
The post struck a chord almost immediately, resonating with mothers across the country who are preparing for the upcoming initiation season.
Unathi was candid about how much harder the experience was for her as a divorcee. At one point, she and her son's father had gone over a year without any communication, not a single phone call or text message. She described the final image in her photo series as the first time the two spoke as co-parents after that long silence. To manage everyone's expectations, she says she leaned heavily on open communication with her family, particularly her father and son.
"Grace was the order of that moment," she wrote, adding that transparency within her family was the only thing that carried them through an experience she described as going in "blind and excommunicated."
For the former Kaya FM host, the initiation transformed not just her son but the entire family unit. She described the weeks following his return as a period of adjustment, learning to welcome "the new versions" of each other. Her son came home quieter, more grounded, and drawn to things he had never shown interest in before, like sitting barefoot outdoors and listening to birds.
Unathi shares advice for moms entering initiation
With invitations coming in to speak at initiation ceremonies this December, Unathi used the post to speak directly to mothers and sons preparing for the month ahead.
She encouraged mothers to cry freely, explaining that the head of the ooZibazana academy in Embo, Cape Town, had told her that the uncontrollable weeping mothers experience during that month is deeply connected to what she called "inimba," the umbilical bond between mother and son. According to the former Idols SA judge, this emotional release from mothers helps free their sons spiritually while they are in the bush.
She also encouraged families to grant their sons space to lead when they return home, while still finding a meeting point between cultural expectations and everyday life.
"I asked that we meet each other in the middle," she noted, reflecting on how she navigated the balance between honouring tradition and acknowledging that women are part of their sons' everyday world.
Read the full post below:
Mzansi reacts to Unathi's post
Reactions to the post poured in from followers navigating similar experiences:
@dlitepix asked:
"Respectful questions: what percentage of young men in your culture go through this process? Did you or he consider not doing it? If so, why did you go ahead?"
@dj_4kdeep wrote:
"This sounds like torture…Like, very sad to read. Why go through it, though…Besides the fact that it is a Xhosa and other tribes' culture? Is there a real benefit to the boy child?"
@goddessmpho said:
"I wish there could be conversations for us (women who have Xhosa sons but we are not Xhosas) on how to navigate. What to do and what not to do because it is a foreign territory for us; rather, let me say, for me. But thanks for this🙌"
@akhona_music shared:
"My son is 21 months old, but I'm already going through so many emotions when I think one day we will go through this journey…"
Source: Instagram
Unathi Nkayi responds to fan
Meanwhile, Briefly News reported that Unathi fired back at a male fan who insinuated she was sniffing cocaine during a live performance.
The singer explained she was dealing with a cold, an open chest outfit, and being pulled from behind by styling and sound.
Source: Briefly News
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