Adwoa Aboah has spent over a decade dedicated to helping girls. Inspired by her own mental health struggles she launched Gurls Talk in 2015, a non-profit that provides a safe space for young women. The community – which spans over 150 countries and has more than 270,000 followers on Instagram – comes together through online and in-person events, where young women are encouraged to have their own voice.
On International Day of The Girl, Grazia spoke to the model and advocate about the pressures girls tell her they're facing right now, how her perspective has evolved ten years on and as a mother to a daughter, and why we need to support communities like Gurls Talk more than ever.
How would you describe the experience of being a girl right now, and how has that changed since you launched Gurls Talk in 2015?
I think being a girl today is harder than ever. And when you look at the world they're growing up in, it makes sense. There's so much violence happening around the world, climate anxiety, body image pressures, this huge sense of loneliness and isolation, and all of it is being fed to them through their phones, 24/7. It's a lot for anyone to deal with, let alone a young girl who's still figuring out who she is.
Something I'm hearing a lot from girls in the Gurls Talk community is this feeling that we're moving backwards. There was a time, with movements like #MeToo and Black Lives Matter, when it felt like things were really changing. We were seeing more diverse bodies, more underrepresented voices, more conversations challenging the way women and girls were expected to look and behave. And now it feels like so much of that is being undone. We're seeing this resurgence of really outdated ideas about women and femininity, with the rise of toxic masculinity, the manosphere, the tradwife movement. It's incredibly frustrating, and I think girls are really feeling that.
And I think we also need to be talking about boys. That's a whole other conversation, but boys are struggling too, and what they're going through has a very real impact on girls. We can't talk about toxic masculinity and the pressures girls are facing without also looking at what's happening with boys, the messages they're receiving, and the expectations being placed on them. They have to be part of the solution. We can't expect things to change for girls if we're not also doing the work with boys.
And then of course there was the pandemic, which changed everything. It made an already difficult situation so much worse, particularly when it comes to mental health and isolation.
So yes, a lot has changed since I started Gurls Talk ten years ago. I think one silver lining is that we're talking about mental health in a way we simply weren't back then. Unfortunately, that's partly because things have gotten so bad that we can't ignore it anymore. But we're still not doing nearly enough, particularly for girls, who are dealing with all these pressures and expectations simply because they're girls.
I don't want to paint a completely bleak picture, though. I think there's also so much opportunity. Girls are speaking up, they're questioning things, they're demanding more. And I think our job is to really listen to them and make sure we're giving them the support and tools they need. Because clearly, what we're doing right now isn't enough.
You're now a mother to a daughter, has that changed or influenced your work at Gurls Talk at all?
When I started Gurls Talk all those years ago, my own story was very much at the root of its mission. I was sharing from a place of lived experience, and in doing so, I found this incredible community that carried me through my twenties and into my thirties. But I'm a very different person now. I know myself better, I'm less affected by things that don't really matter, and I feel much more confident in who I am. And while I've spent so many years sharing my own experiences, I'm now much more interested in listening.
In many ways, I'm approaching Gurls Talk with fresh eyes again. I'm the student now. I want to soak up as much as I can from the girls in our community, to understand what they're going through, what they're struggling with and what they need from the adults in their lives. Because one day my daughter will face so many of those same challenges, and I want to be the best parent, confidante and teacher I can be. How do I take everything I've learned through Gurls Talk, every conversation I've had, every story I've heard, and actually put it into practice as a mother? How do I create that same judgment-free space in my relationship with my daughter, where she feels she can tell me absolutely anything?
And of course, when you become a mother, all you want to do is protect your child. I look around at the world right now and, quite frankly, it's terrifying. My instinct is to shield her from all of it. But I know that's impossible. I can't control the world she's going to grow up in, or protect her from every difficult experience. What I can do is help her develop the tools to navigate it, to understand her emotions, ask for help, stand up for herself and feel some sense of agency in a world that can feel completely out of control.
That's particularly personal to me because I didn't have those tools growing up. I had to reach such a low point before I finally got the help I needed. Nobody was really talking about mental health, and I spent years suffering in silence, telling myself I just needed to get over it. And that's such a huge part of what we're trying to change with Gurls Talk. Giving girls the resources, understanding and practical tools to look after themselves before they reach a breaking point, and empowering them to advocate for themselves and each other.
And community is everything. It saved my life all those years ago in the rooms of AA and NA, and it continues to be such an important part of my life. I want my daughter to know she doesn't have to do everything alone, that there are people she can lean on who will accept her exactly as she is.
'I want my daughter to know she doesn't have to do everything alone'
Having a child also makes you rethink so much of your own upbringing, not just your family but the culture you grew up in. I grew up in a culture of silence, and I'm determined not to recreate that for my daughter. I want her to feel that nothing is off limits, that she can ask questions and talk about difficult things without shame. And I think that's where motherhood and Gurls Talk have really come together for me. I've spent years talking about empathy, understanding and the importance of giving girls a voice. Now I have to make sure I'm actually living those values as a mother, listening rather than assuming I have all the answers, and being willing to learn from my daughter as much as I hope she'll learn from me.
Given real community for young people feels so limited at the moment, do you feel that an organisation like Gurls Talk is needed more than ever?
Absolutely. I think we need communities like Gurls Talk now more than ever. We're living through this huge crisis of loneliness and isolation, and I think young people, particularly girls, are really feeling it.
Something we hear time and again from girls in our community is just how much it means to hear from someone they can relate to. To hear someone talk about something they've been struggling with and realize they're not the only one. That feeling of not being alone is so powerful, and I think sometimes we underestimate just how much it matters.
For me, that's always been at the heart of Gurls Talk. Creating a community where girls can show up exactly as they are, without judgment, without feeling like they need to be someone else. Where they feel accepted and like they belong. And we know there's actual research behind this. Feeling connected, feeling like you belong, has a real impact on your mental health and wellbeing. It's not just a nice thing to have, it's something we all need.
I also think we need to remember that girls are navigating so many spaces that don't necessarily feel safe to them, whether that's physically or emotionally, online or in real life. So creating spaces where they feel safe enough to be vulnerable, to ask questions, to share what they're going through, is incredibly important.
And alongside that sense of community, girls need actual resources. Things that speak to their experiences and the specific challenges they're facing, that they can turn to when they're struggling. That's really what we're trying to do at Gurls Talk, bring together that feeling of connection and belonging with practical mental health support that girls can actually use.
So yes, I think we need so much more of this work. Everything we're hearing from girls tells us they want and need more of it. But the reality is that girls' mental health still isn't getting nearly enough attention, and there's very little funding going into this space. We need people to recognize just how important this is, because no one should have to figure all of this out on their own.
Gurls Talk have launched their own interactive zine, a mental health resource that brings together clinical guidance, practical advice, interactive activities, journal prompts, and the lived experiences of girls and young women. You can check it out on their website.