Savoring the Ordinary

By Lizabeth Roemer, Ph.D., and Josh Bartok, M.S

Author and cartoonist Sophie Lucido Johnson shared a post on Instagram, reminding people that “ordinary” birds like robins and house sparrows are actually extraordinary if you pay attention. She cautions viewers not to dismiss them with the phrase “It’s just a….” How often do we dismiss elements and moments of our lives in a similar way? We have written about other lessons for well-being that come from birding here and here. And Johnson provides yet another lesson in well-being from birding—the benefits of viewing the ordinary with fresh eyes and interest. What if we encounter the everyday not as “just another….” but as a luminous manifestation of itself?

Our minds’ ability to quickly recognize familiar stimuli allows us to preserve our attention for input that requires more cognitive resources. While this is adaptive, it can also lead us to overlook sights, sounds, tastes, smells, and sensations that bring with them a sense of joy, satisfaction, meaning, or connectedness. We might be so focused on preparing for a busy day that we fail to notice leaves turning, flowers blooming, birds chirping, or a stranger’s kindness during our commute.

We can similarly overlook “ordinary” actions we or others engage in, leading us to not appreciate the many small contributions we are each making to one another and the world. We may dismiss others’, or even our own, small acts of kindness or moments of connection as “It’s just a thank you note”; “It’s just allowing a car to merge”; or “It’s just taking out the trash.” In this way, we may miss moments of generosity or care that can enhance our experience, particularly when our attention is so easily drawn to acts of cruelty and harm.

One way to counter this natural inattentiveness to the mundane is to intentionally practice beginner’s mind, playfully meeting ordinary moments as if we had never experienced them before—with curiosity and wonder—rather than on automatic pilot or as “just” another iteration. Try these brief, simple practices and notice whether they enhance your life.

Notice your environment each morning

People often start their morning automatically engaging in a variety of activities that are needed before launching into their days. Spend 5-10 minutes of your morning bringing curiosity to typically mindless actions. What do you see around your house as you make your way through morning routines? Are there any sights that bring a sense of pleasure or pleasant recollection? What do you see out your window? Do you notice any sounds? Smells? What does your breakfast actually taste like?

Changing environments is an opportunity to notice

We regularly move from one place to another focused on where we’re going, rather than where we are—leading us to miss every step on the path to get there. Instead of focusing on your destination (or how long it’s taking to get there!), see if you can bring a fresh perspective to the journey as you make your way to work, your children’s school, or the grocery store. Notice the humans, animals, and plants you encounter along the path, including the birds that some people may regard as “just a pigeon” (or an ibis if you’re in Australia!).

Savoring activities

Repetition can lead us to become numb to activities that we initially chose because we enjoy or value them. Family movie nights can devolve into everyone distracted by their phones; favorite meals can be eaten mindlessly; and conversations can be interrupted by countless distractions. Removing distractions (like phones) and intentionally bringing a beginner's mind to these activities can enhance the satisfaction and reward you gain from them (Livingstone & Srivastava, 2012). We also may fail to notice and appreciate others’ routine activities as well—see if you can notice the mundane tasks someone near you does. Did someone clear the table, pay bills, make a meal, or do something else that enhances your life? Might there be some inward or outward gratitude you might want to express?

Paying attention to communication

We are inundated with emails, texts, and other forms of communication that lack personal connection and meaning. This can lead us to not appreciate when meaningful communications and connections do occur, such as a kind statement in an email, or a text from someone we haven’t seen in a while. Try practicing noticing these communications as they arise, and also intentionally providing brief, meaningful communication to others, as a way of countering the negative impact of information overload.

We invite you to turn your “It’s just a…” reactions into a moment of noticing and savoring, bringing appreciation, satisfaction, or meaning into your lives. Even the photo we include with this piece is an example of turning “It’s just a morning glory” into a moment of appreciation.

Josh Bartok is a contemplative photographer and life coach, and the author of two children’s books.

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