Queen Camilla praises revenge porn victim Zara McDermott and says survivors of domestic abuse are the 'real heroes' in campaign to end violence against women

Queen Camilla praised Zara McDermott for 'speaking out' about her revenge porn ordeal as she lauded survivors of domestic abuse for being the 'real heroes' of the campaign to end violence against women. 

Her Majesty was attending the Ending Violence Against Women and Girls Summit at Marlborough College in Wiltshire, and after meeting the reality star, stressed that the world needs to 'catch up' with the threat of online abuse.

The summit was organised by one of Camilla's assistants, Queen's Companion Lady Lansdowne, who is also chair of the Wiltshire branch of the organisation. 

Zara is a documentary maker and influencer who has also become a campaigner in the field after becoming the victim of revenge porn, once when she was 14, and again during her stint on Love Island in 2018.

The Queen told Zara, who is also the girlfriend of One Direction star Louis Tomlinson: 'It's people like you who speak out…' 

She said afterwards: 'I think it is my responsibility to [use what happened to her] in a positive way. 

'Especially in my world, the world of social media and the digital space, we have so much power to connect with people, speak to them directly. 

'I believe that every single person who has a platform has a responsibility to be positive with it.

'Technology has brought a whole new dimension to the issue. Women are struggling to identify whether they are being abused or not. My speech today is called the ''abuse in our pocket''. 

'Phones bring a new raft of problems, particularly where the lines between the physical and the online world blur. The face of abuse is changing. But we need to treat them the same. 

'We need to catch up, essentially. Women are told ''well just delete it, block them''. But why should we have to make ourselves so much smaller. It is putting pressure on the victim, not the perpetrator.'

Lady Lansdowne said she had been inspired to set it up by the work Camilla is doing in the sphere to end abuse against women. 

Her Majesty took a seat in the auditorium to listen to speeches by Jess Phillips MP and Domestic Abuse Commissioner for England and Wales, Dame Nicole Jacobs, about plans to halve violence against women and girls on a national level. 

Afterwards she got up and spoke, without notes, for almost five minutes about her 'heroes' in the field. 

She said her own determination to do whatever she could to help those affected was inspired by a visit to the charity Safe Lives where she heard the best friend of Jo Simpson, killed by her abusive estranged husband, speak in harrowing detail about the case. 

She said of Hetti Barkworth Nanton CBE, now chair of the board at Refuge: 'It was one of the bravest things I've ever seen. As her best friend, she got up with such dignity and told this horrific story. She is one of the real heroes of this cause.'

She also praised Jo's mother, Diana Parkes, who also spoke at the event, saying: 'She is a fantastic lady. 

'She's of a certain age, she lost her beloved daughter and a lot of people would have hidden away and shut the door and buried themselves forever. But she got up and got out there and she spoke to people. 

'I have such admiration for her. She survived the ordeal and she survived it by helping others and stopping others from suffering the same fate.' 

The Queen said she had travelled across the world visiting organisations working with victims and survivors and said that 'this country is doing more than any other'. 'I want to say a huge thanks to you all and to everyone,' she said. 

'As a resident of Wiltshire I am deeply impressed that they are leading the way to ending domestic violence. 'I want to say the real heroes are the survivors. Not the victims. 

'The survivors who come forward and tell us all their stories. It's terrifying to get up onto a platform and talk about something so horrific, the things that have happened to them, to stand in front of an audience and talk I just want to applaud them. 

'Talking is what we have to do. Domestic abuse was a taboo subject and nobody talked about it. It was hush hush. Now people are getting up and talking about it. We might be able to put an end to it.' 

Lady Lansdowne said of the summit: 'We wanted Wiltshire to be better at protecting women and girls. 

'Because violence against women and girls is not something that could be solved by one organisation, one service…and it's certainly not an issue that belongs only to government, the police, charities, or those working directly with victims and survivors. 

'The responsibility belongs to all of us. 

'This is what this coalition and today's summit is about. It's about bringing people together, who may encounter this issue from very different perspectives, and asking, ''What more can we achieve if we work together?''

She said the abuse of women and girls was being 'increasingly enabled' by technology, which can all too often infiltrate the place they should feel safe, their home. 

And she added: 'There is extraordinary work for me taking place in this county, to protect women and girls. And we've recognised that today. But there are still gaps. There are millions of women who do not feel safe. 

'There are still victims who struggle to be heard, believed, and are then let down. There are too many times when the system does not join up around the person who needs it most, and then they are failed. 

'That's why collaboration matters so much. 'My hope in establishing the Wiltshire coalition was not to create another talking shop or tell anyone how to do their job. 

'It was to create a community of people, prepared to learn from one another, challenge one another, and importantly, act together, through education, collaboration and relationships. 

'We will hear different perspectives throughout the summit. We will hear about what is working, but I hope people also be brave enough to talk about what is not. We will consider what is happening nationally, and what that means, hopefully. 

'We will look at policing, prevention, so-called victims of violence, and that some of the new and changing forms of this that women and girls are experiencing. And importantly, we will hear from people who understand the human consequences of these issues. 

'Because ultimately, the test of everything we expect today should be quite simple. Does it make women and girls safer? 

'If we know there is a gap, we should ask what we can do about it and if organisations need to work differently together. 

'This is an ambitious goal. But looking around this room today, I feel it's a challenge we can meet.'