Any Newcastle United fans out there who have a bit of a social media presence may well be familiar with Toon Polls.
This is basically a Newcastle fan who has created a monopoly on any polls conducted on X related to NUFC.
Anyone conducting their own poll needs to tag him to get full exposure and he has a string of impressive victories influencing wider national votes in favour of Newcastle United.
Bizarrely, his biggest claim to fame may have been hijacking a Burger King poll by saying ‘Nick Pope’, in one of those inexplicable moments where the internet blows up at something bizarre.
I don’t think Polls was complaining about the amount of free Whoppers he got as a result.
Anyway, I mention this to set the scene for one such poll that occurred last week, which drew considerable discussion on The Mag Podcast. This began with TP asking “What annoys you most about your fellow NUFC fans behaviour at St James’?”
The responses to this were a form of therapy it seems, as people unloaded longstanding gripes. The responses with the most likes were filtered into two semi-final polls, with the top four then going head to head.
I won’t spoil the ultimate outcome but suffice to say there were some excellent points that were only ever going to resonate with a person as easily irritated as myself.
I particularly enjoyed ‘clapping the attendance’ making it to the semis, as my alleged friend and supposed co-host Simon Cahill enjoys clapping and barking like a blotchy ginger seal when this gets announced, specifically to annoy me as he knows how irritated I get by the banality of it all.
🎙️ LISTEN TO THE CLIP FROM THE MAG POD
Clapping the attendance, Katsu chicken & mood hoovers: Matchday indiscretions debated.
Jamie, Simon, and Hutch react to Toon Polls’ matchday behaviour debate and unload their biggest St James’ Park pet peeves. Press play to listen:
Want the full episode? Listen to Episode 10 of The Mag Pod here on Apple, Spotify, or your preferred app »
The fact that our area also constantly stinks of Katsu Chicken was enough for me to nod enthusiastically at the inclusion of constant eaters on the list.
My own suggestion of ‘negativity’ made it to the final, although it was maybe short of context. People who turn up in a bad mood (usually for reasons beyond football) and start loudly whingeing and moaning are mood hoovers, and the atmosphere in my own part of the ground suffers noticeably when the bloke behind gets started on Jacob Murphy around 00:13 into each game.
Let your frustrations out if things go badly but don’t have that as your starting point.
The full list and poll outcomes are discussed in this week’s episode of The Mag Pod, or available on Toon Polls X account. It is well worth a consider for anyone heading to the match this weekend to sit among a shower of intolerable annoyances behaving disgracefully and unacceptably.
And before anyone comes at me, it’s an Englishman’s right to have a bit whinge, so no I won’t be giving you my ticket.
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST ST JAMES’ PARK PET PEEVE?
Is it clapping the attendance, constant eating, early whingeing, or something else entirely? Where do you stand on Toon Polls’ matchday behaviour debate?
Have your say and share your matchday indiscretions in the comments below! 👇